Gleniz da Menace
I was doing my very late mid-year review a while ago (yet to be published) at after kong matuwa sa mga na-accomplish kong goals, na-stress ako after. Dun kasi sa 13 goals na sinet ko in the beginning of the year, dalwa lang yung fail, tapos isa na lang yung natitirang work in progress. So parang sa isip ko, isa na lang? Meron pang 4 months na natitira this year. Ano pang dapat kong gawin?
Pinapanood ko yung vlog ni Heart at Chiz tapos may nabanggit dun na, “Breaking up with a true friend would certainly hurt.” Nag-standout sakin yung words na “true friend”.
Recently I had a falling out with a friend of 20+ years and ngayon, I really feel and know that I’m better off. Initially I was hurt pero ang bilis kong naka-move on. At yung rason siguro ay dahil I recently discovered na hindi na pala sya nagfi-fit dun sa description of a “true friend”. Kaya siguro ang dali nyang bitawan.
Let’s take a break from writing about our recent trip at mag-recalibrate. Since natapos na nga yung contract ko sa previous work ko, I’m currently on a break. It’s been 2 weeks since our trip at ang ginagawa ko lang ay:
Nasa Costco ako at tinitingnan ‘to:
Merong puti na lumapit sakin. Feeling ko in her 60s na sya. Tawagin natin syang Molly.
Gusto ko yung natutunan ko sa ‘Waking Up’ app:
Parang sabi wag daw tayong ma-feel bad if we’re missing out. Kasi missing out means you get to focus on just a few things or people, hence, living a richer life. Kasi pag yes lang tayo ng yes sa lahat, or collect lang tayo ng collect ng friends/acquaintances, sabog sabog yung experience. We’re spreading ourselves too thin.
Naihalintulad ko yung fear of missing out sa paginom ng mango juice na overly diluted with water. Hint na lang nung mango yung malalasahan ko. Nakakabitin at hindi enjoyable. Unlike pag pure mango juice, ang sarap, ang rich ng flavor. So tingin ko ang sinasabi dito, mas masarap ang buhay if you only commit your time to a few important things/events/hobbies/people.
At dahil dyan, nagkaron ng another level of meaning for me yung saying na, “Less is more.”
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After meditating, gusto ko yung sinuggest ni Headspace to set intentions for the week. So napaisip ako at pinicture ko kung ano ba yung mga possibilities for the week ahead:
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Bago pa matapos ang May, ike-kwento ko muna ‘to. Nalaman ko somewhere na ang buwan ng Mayo ay ‘Masturbation Month’. Meron palang ganun. Sabi ko kay Kenneth, “Ang May pala ay Masturbation Month.” Nagulat na natawa lang sya, pero na-feel kong medyo na-awkward.
Pagbukas ko ng bintana, bumulagta sakin ang malawak na asul at matingkad na kahel. Sobrang sarap sa pakiramdam. Nakatitig lang ako ng ilang minuto habang nakangiti at nilalanghap ang sandaling ito. Inisa-isa kong tinitigan ang mga punong walang dahon at napansin kong umiindayog sila sa ihip ng hangin na mistulang kumakaway. Hindi maikakaila na panandalian nitong naiibsan ang lumbay at ligalig ng buhay—kahit ilang minuto lang. Salamat sa kamangha-manghang palabas. Sana bukas ulit.
Gleniz da Menace