I realized that I may have gone overboard with my journaling. Suddenly, I wanted to capture all my thoughts, every single one of them—but I have too many thoughts which makes documenting everything unrealistic. After that uneasy realization, I try to remember what makes journaling therapeutic for me. Journaling empties my mind and relaxes me, leaving me refreshed and unburdened. I think what’s important for me to remember is that journaling is a tool and not a chore. I have to be at peace with the fact that it’s impossible to capture and document everything, that it’s okay to forget things here and there. Except this one. This is quite important. I should also learn to trust my self that when it comes to truly and absolutely important things, I won’t forget.
A couple of months ago, I started paying for Etsy ads. What it does is when a potential customer search for something that’s similar to what I offer, my listing will get prioritization and will be placed on the top search. I alloted $1 per day for these Etsy ads hoping to drive more sales ($1 a day is a lot for my small sticker shop). During these months of running ads, I barely make anything. Every sale I make goes to these ad payments and it’s not even driving more sales. There were times when I even owe them money because my sales weren’t compensating for the ad payments. So a few weeks ago, I stopped paying for the ads. Seeing my money disappear like that, having a negative balance on my payment dashboard, it was starting to get depressing.
I read a lot of non-fiction in 2022 and it’s currently my favorite genre—specifically non-fiction books about psychology and mindfulness.
MY 5-STAR READS
54% of the books I read are rated 5 stars. Nice!
1. Upstream: Selected Essays by Mary Oliver
Calming. Invigorating. Enlightening. [Full review]
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Fake Twitter #28
I learned yesterday that women are smarter because we orgasm better. Anong connect you might ask? Tinatamad akong i-explain. Basta nabasa ko lang.
J’ai oublié d’écrire ici en français. Bonjour! C’est mardi et il est 6h30 du matin. Je me suis levé vers 5h du matin. Je regarde par la fenêtre et la neige melting déjà. Je miss les arbres blancs. Mais ça va parce que dans quelques minutes, je vais voir le soleil se lever.
I forgot to write here in French. Good morning! It’s Tuesday and it’s 6:30 in the morning. I got up around 5AM. I’m looking at the window and the snow is already melting. I miss the white trees. But it’s okay because in a few minutes, I’m going to see the sun rise.
I don’t know if they’re fighting or playing
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Fake Twitter #27
THEME:
Sink into the Present
I chose this kasi eto yung overarching theme ng mga paboritong non-fiction books na nabasa ko last year. Eto ang sagot sa overthinking, sa anxiety, sa pag-eenjoy, sa pag-create ng good relationships. When I’m truly present, I only focus sa kung anong nangyayari right in front of me, right at this moment. I’m forced to get rid of the past (where it’s nice to revisit sometimes until you get stuck) and the future (where everything is uncertain, pressuring the brain to do a lot of guesswork which leads to overthinking and anxiety). So instead, I will do my best to let the present be my default mode and only pay brief visits to the past and future when needed.
Eto ang mga sinabi kong susubukan kong gawin nung 2022. Bago ako gumawa ng 2023 game plan, ire-review ko muna:
PHYSICAL & MENTAL HEALTH
Goal #1: Make healthy food choices
Outcome: Needs improvement
Nagkakaron ako ng phase na healthy for a few weeks tapos babalik nanaman sa food deliveries. Pero super nag-eenjoy na ko sa mga vegan meals. Minsan pipiliin ko yung vegan option pero hindi ko nafi-feel na may kulang. Kasi may mga vegan/vegetarian meals na masarap naman talaga.
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Walang Sense
Ang hirap pala ng walang pang-amoy at panlasa. Feeling ko false negative talaga yung tatlong COVID test ko kasi mas malala pa yung symptoms ko kay Kenneth. Tapos eto na nga, pareho kaming hindi nag-eenjoy kumain.
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2022 Highlights
- Got an Apple Watch nung start of the year.
So almost isang taon na pala ‘to sakin. Everyday ko naman syang ginagamit pero hindi ko alam kung nakadagdag ba sya ng value sa buhay ko. Nung una oo kasi excited pa, dami kong apps na dinownload. Pero nung tumagal, ginagamit ko na lang sya pang-check ng oras at weather. Siguro yung pinaka-best feature nya for me ay yung remote camera.
Happy (?) New Year. Hays sumama nanaman ang pakiramdam ko. Kala ko pagaling na ko. More than a week na kong may sakit gusto ko nang gumalinggg..
After 5 Christmases here in Canada, eto ang pinakamasayang Pasko ko. Binasa ko uli ang mga nakaraang Pasko at eto ang summary:
2017 – Last Pasko sa Pilipinas
2018 – First Christmas sa Canada kaya distracted pa (di pa homesick). First time din maka-experience ng white people Christmas party.
2019 – Depressed sa pagka-homesick. Maghapong nagmukmok sa apartment, walang pakana.
2020 – Bumawi. Masaya at buong araw nagluto.
2021 – Neutral. May konting iyak pero may saya.
2022
Dec 24
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Fake Twitter #25
Nakakapagbasa na ko which means magaling na ko! Yayy. Ilang araw nang masama ang pakiramdam ko ultimo pagbabasa hindi ko magawa. Naputol yung reading streak ko pero okay lang, gusto ko lang magpagaling. Di rin ako makapagsulat. Naiipon na ang mga kwento ko. For now eto muna.
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Faux Aurora Borealis
It’s Christmas Eve! Na-boost yung mood ko pagtingin ko sa bintana. Hindi ma-capture ng maayos nung camera ko pero greenish yung sky ngayon 🤍 First time ko ‘to mapansin kaya super na-excite ako. Bigla ko naalala yung aurora borealis kasi green. Kelan kaya ako makakakita ng aurora borealis. Yung as in legit.
Eto ang lineup ng mga binabasa ko ngayon:
1. Recapture the Rapture by Jamie Wheal
After 78 pages (about 25%), mas gets ko na kung tungkol san ‘tong binabasa ko. Haha. Pero nag enjoy naman ako pagbabasa kahit vague pa sa isip ko nung una.
Gleniz Da Menace 