I read this New Yorker article about friendship, ‘The Trouble with Friends’. Feeling ko, it was a reality check. Narealize ko, my hope and aim for friendships were too idealistic and childlike. Ang nakatatak sa utak ko, “Gusto ko lang naman ng someone ngayon kung pano kami ng grade school bestfriends ko noon.” Yung updated kami with every single little ganap ng isa’t isa. Yung tanggap namin yung pettiness, we talk every single day, walang nakikipag-compete, we want to hangout as much as possible, etc.
For some naive reason, I still hope for this kind of friendship. But this article opened my eyes to the truth: adult friendships are just different. Old friendships won’t be as tight-knit as before, and some will just slowly falter. Your friends, no matter how inseparable you were, and no matter how close you are until now, will end up in different geographic locations—ako pa nga yung isa sa mga unang umalis, so ano bang nirereklamo ko?
I am sooo overwhelmed. Wala na kong work at hindi na ko pumapasok pero parang 18 hrs akong nagtrabaho kahapon. 3:30AM gising na ko. Sabi ko magmo-morning routine muna ako para kalmado ang simula ng araw ko, kasi alam kong madami akong aasikasuhin para sa paglipat namin. Pero nung napa-check ako ng e-mail ko, ayun, nagdire-diretso na hanggang 9PM. Parang ang dami kong adrenaline kahapon. Hindi ako nagugutom. Pag wala akong kausap at ka-email, maglilinis ako ng apartment. Akala ko mahaba yung magiging tulog ko kasi ang dami kong ginawa. Pero eto, gising na ko ng 4AM.
I knew October would be a great month, and it did not disappoint 🤍
Halloween 🎃
The major thing that happened this month was our first US trip! I think almost all of my October entries are related to this trip. And yes, hindi pa rin kami nakakamove on ni Kenneth. We still talk about it every chance we get 😂
OCTOBER DIGEST
I think I might have overshared when I wrote about *toot* in my life updates. I’m trying to imagine it from a reader’s perspective and wondering if it was a bit too much. Personally, I don’t feel any shame or awkwardness—probably because I know that only 5 people will have access to it hehe. Either way, I’m just concerned about the reader’s threshold for TMI.
We were still in the US when I wrote my Thursday letter, so I talked a little bit about our experience going to Billie Eilish’s concert and how we were enjoying our vacation.
Had fun doing our quarterly expense report, especially creating the visuals for it. The most refreshing part was sharing our real numbers.
Though a bit tedious, I also shared how much we spent on our US trip. I found myself a bit puzzled when I saw the total. Ganito ba talaga dapat? It was enlightening, to say the least. Speaking of expenses, I also shared my NYC haul. It’s mostly stationery goods.
I’m enjoying writing so so much right now. I talked about my commonplace book a few days ago and how I call it my ‘life notes’.
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First, my best buy and bye-bye of the week. I am going to exclude all food items because I’m just going to list almost everything we ate.
Best Buys
I am no collector of anything. Some people are into shoes, bags, books, toys, etc. But personally, I just couldn’t relate. I feel like I’m hoarding. It seems impractical. To be clear, I don’t mean this as a badge of honor, I’m just saying what makes sense in my head. I don’t see the point in having five pairs of shoes when I only wear one pair at a time. I rotate between two pairs, one black and one white. It’s just so easy to pair with anything.
I guess I’m also too lazy to style and mix and match. If I only have two pairs, and if it’s black and white, it would only take me 2 seconds to decide which one I want to wear that day. If I were a guy, I would probably one of those annoying men who owns a stack of the same black shirt and just wear those everyday.
$26 ~ A crybaby blind box
I’m the total opposite of my mom who loves bags and has a cabinet full of decorative plates and cups on display. It’s also possible that the more I see my mother collect these bags that are taking up so much space in her already crowded room, the more I veer away from being that way. I share all of these little anecdotes about practicality only to say that, the moment I saw this crybaby things, something has shifted haha. Suddenly, I wanted to get my hands on these cute little things! I guess I just hadn’t found anything I was truly drawn to—until that evening when we were strolling around this random mall and saw a Pop Mart vending machine.
Cutesicles!
Having made a blog post of me being such a crybaby, this blind box toy spoke to me. It’s just so me! When I saw the side of the box with all the possible crybabies I could get, I’d be happy with any of them. Huhu they’re all so adorable. And those teary eyes? Ugh, too cute. I think my favorites are 01 and 06.
This is what I got. UGH. Sinong hindi makakatiis 🥹🥰
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I’ve been writing a lot for my blog over the past few days. I don’t know why I’m so excited about it. It feels like I’m doing something important when I’m actually not. I guess I just have a lot to say to no one in particular, and I’m glad to have the space to let it out. I’m living for that moment of possibility when someone, somewhere, would read it out of curiosity. I’m aware a handful of people read the blog, but it still feels unbelievable. I don’t even care if they like it or not, I’m just thankful for their time.
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Doing our quarterly expenses is completely new to me. I usually just compare our expenses month to month and that’s it. But every month is different, so I think calculating the quarterly average would give a more useful snapshot of our spending. I’ll provide the percentages first, then give a detailed breakdown with the numbers.
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Aantayin ko pa dapat isulat sa next ‘happy things’ list ko but I KENAT contain my happiness. Sobrang thank you sa mga bagong nag-subscribe sa paid tier. HUHUHU (totoo ‘tong “huhuhu” kasi napaiyak talaga ko). Salamat salamat!!
Yung mga pinuntahan namin ngayon, ito yung mga popular na attractions. Akala ko mga napuntahan ko na pero hindi pa pala. Kaya ang saya na first time namin pare-pareho.
Morning festivities
Hindi pa sumasagot yung Airbnb host tungkol sa shower. Kasi nakalagay naman sa listing nila may hot water. Iniisip ko 8 days pa kami dito tapos ice tubig yung ipanliligo namin araw-araw?? Huhu noooo!
This trip is 8 months old pero sinipag akong i-document. Nung umuwi ako ng 2022, ang side trip namin ay Bohol. This year, excited ako kasi first time ng Mama at ni Tricia sa Japan! Winter yung visit namin kaya ang hassle, kasi mga makakapal na jackets ang dala namin. Nagkasakit rin ako dahil sa extended exposure sa lamig, plus yung pagod paglalakad. Nagkaron pa ng drama at iyakan nung huling parts ng trip. Haha!
Ambilis! Nabibilisan din ba kayo? Parang kelan lang nung umuwi akong Pilipinas. Di ako makapaniwala na February pa pala yun. Tapos ilang araw na lang October na. Magpapasko na! Ambilis!
Reflecting on September, I feel like this month was full of hope. Hope for my Mama’s health to get better and better, hope for my career (whatever that will be), hope that someone will subscribe to my paid newsletter (thank you ulit), and hope for better outcomes that are yet to unfold. As a recovering pessimist, I thought being an optimist was the better option—but being hopeful feels more true and grounded.
SEPTEMBER DIGEST
I started a paid tier here on my blog! I’ve always wanted to start a Patreon or a Substack, but why not just do it here? I am more comfortable here and it’s just easier. This idea has been building up for years, and I finally acted upon it. Aside from my friends’ encouragement, this is my why.
Expressed how I miss and love my younger sisters 🤍 My tall sister and my other tall sister from another mother who just turned 18. I wrote her ‘18 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was 18’ as my second birthday gift and we had a cry fest!
Did a breakdown of my weekly expense in ‘What I Spend in a Week’ and shared my savings goal for a future trip
Gleniz da Menace 